How to Grow Personally While Being Swamped
Life gets busy. Trust me, I know. As a dad of three girls, an entrepreneur, and someone juggling a job, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. But here is the thing: without growth, you do not just feel stuck, you are stuck. It is like living the same day on repeat. What you do not actively work to improve will keep you trapped, or even worse, cause you to backslide.
So, how do you grow personally when you feel like there is no time for it? I have found that making growth a priority, no matter how busy life gets, is essential to breaking free from that repetitive cycle.
Growth Begins with Acknowledgment
The first step in growing when you are swamped is acknowledging that you have limits and areas where you can improve. Whether it is in marriage, parenting, or work, there are always areas where we hit a wall. The key is not to let those walls define you. Acknowledge where you are stuck, but do not stop there, make a plan to improve.
Treat your life like an ongoing experiment. You are not a finished product. Instead of saying, “I am not good at this,” ask yourself, “What can I learn from this? How can I get better next time?” This mindset keeps you moving forward, even when you are overwhelmed.
I am not saying you should focus on your weaknesses. As John Maxwell says, “The world does not pay for average.” But I am talking about growth in your important zones, the areas of life that truly matter to you. For me, that means prioritizing my relationship with my family, no matter how busy I get.
Time is Not the Issue
One of the biggest challenges we face is the feeling that we just do not have time to grow. I used to think the same. But I realized that mindset was holding me back. The truth is, "I do not have time" is often an excuse for not setting proper boundaries or being clear on your values. When you are putting out small fires, it is easy to lose sight of what is most important.
I had to adjust my thinking. Instead of focusing on how much time I needed, I focused on making time for the things that matter. Small, intentional progress is better than no progress. I stopped trying to carve out huge chunks of time for personal growth and started making the most of the little moments. You might not have an hour to read, but you probably have five minutes. And that can make all the difference.
The Game I Play
I came up with a little game to motivate myself. My kids are always learning something new, and they are growing fast. I challenge myself to keep up with them. It is my way of reminding myself that growth is not just for them—it is for me too. Life is a constant process of learning and improving.
For example, I recently started Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. It has been an incredible experience, but also humbling. I get my butt kicked regularly, but I have learned to embrace that. My professor told me, “Stop trying to win and start looking to learn.” That was a huge mindset shift for me. It is not about getting it right all the time, it’s about getting better over time.
Practical Steps to Grow When You Are Swamped
Here are three things that help me grow every day, even when I feel overwhelmed:
A - Audio Input: I listen to something that inspires or educates me daily. But I learned to narrow down my sources of input. Instead of listening to ten different podcasts, I focus on a few trusted voices. This allows me to go deeper and truly learn from them.
B - Books: My goal is to read for at least 15 minutes each day. But if I only read one page, I still count that as a win. Often, the hardest part is just opening the book. Once you start, it is easier to keep going. The small steps add up over time.
C - Communication: Every day, I try to connect with people who help me grow. This includes mentors, my team, and my family. Warren Buffet says, “If you want to grow your net worth, develop your communication skills.” Growth happens through conversation as much as through books or lessons.
Sometimes, We Are Just Being Sissies
Now, let me be real: sometimes, we are just making excuses. David Goggins talks about the 40 Percent Rule, which says that when you think you are done, you are really only at 40 percent of your capacity. That is true for most of us. We stop because we think we are exhausted, but the truth is we have more in the tank.
My wife, Tan, has this great analogy. She says, “If the kitchen were on fire, would you just sit there?” Of course not. You would get up and put it out. This is a reminder that we usually have more energy and ability than we give ourselves credit for. Sometimes, you just have to push through and fight for your growth.
The Power of Trajectory
The most important thing I have learned is that growth is not about where you are today, it’s about the direction you are headed. James Clear says, “You should be far more concerned with your current trajectory than with your current results.” Even if the steps feel small, they are still steps forward. As long as you are moving in the right direction, you are growing.
Final Thoughts
Personal growth is not about perfection. It is about making consistent, intentional progress. Even when life gets busy, you can always find a way to grow. Start small, prioritize what matters, and keep moving forward. You do not need to have all the time in the world, you just need to make time for what is most important. Growth is possible, even when you are swamped.